February 2012
155 posts
“Maybe…you’ll fall in love with me all over again.”
“Hell,” I said, “I love you...”
– Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms (via serialstranger)
Unconditional
tylerknott:
All we can control in this silly and wildly perfect life is the love that we choose to give out without any regard to ever getting it back in return. -Tyler Knott Gregson-
Friend: Marching band isn't a sport.
Me: Ok, so march.
Friend: *Marches*
Me: No, not like that. Your upper body can't move. Roll your feet. Now stop jerking. Now go backwards. Now on your toes. No, stop bouncing. Now jazz run.
Friend: How do you guys do this?
Me: Now do it with an instrument.
Me: Now with a uniform.
Me: Now memorize eight minutes of music.
Me: Now memorize 90 places on the field and how long it takes to get there.
Me: Now make the forms look pretty too.
Me: Now spend 14 hours a week at practice.
Me: Now do it in whatever weather conditions happen to exist at the moment.
Me: Now-
Friend: OK, you win.
The beginnings of the American Revolution,...
BRITISH EMPIRE: All right, fine, your stupid embargo worked. We won’t levy any more taxes-
AMERICAN COLONIES: Huzzah! Time to get drunk!
BRITISH EMPIRE: Except on tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: What?
BRITISH EMPIRE: Get over it, it’s just tea. Seriously, where do you get this idea that you’re special and should never have to pay taxes? We hope that idea doesn’t go on to infect your political discourse centuries from now.
AMERICAN COLONIES: We’re not buying your stupid tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Are you being serious right now? What are you going to do, just stop drinking tea?
AMERICAN COLONIES: Yes. We’ll drink coffee.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do you even know what that is?
AMERICAN COLONIES: No, but we’ve heard it’s good and we’re feeling surly.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Fine, whatever, we don’t even care what you do anymore.
BRITISH EAST INDIA COMPANY: Actually, we are pretty much bankrupt, so you need to make them drink the tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Oh, for—just drink the tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: No.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: NO.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: Fuck you.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it or we’ll punch you in the face.
AMERICAN COLONIES: *Boston Tea Party*
BRITISH EMPIRE: What the hell?
AMERICAN COLONIES: We heard it was Indians.
BRITISH EMPIRE: That’s interesting, because we heard it was a bunch of colonists wearing paint and dressed in costumes that were remarkably similar to what a crowd of drunks who wanted to look like Indians would assemble if the only supplies they had were found in an alley behind a bar.
AMERICAN COLONIES: You get all types in Boston.
BRITISH EMPIRE: …*Coercive Acts*
AMERICAN COLONIES: Oh, it is ON.
“A true photograph need not be explained, nor can it be contained in words.”
– Ansel Adams (via timelightbox)
tylerknott:
“The First Days of Spring” by Noah...
